Archive for the ‘Citat’ Category

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps

tisdag, september 14th, 2010

Men jag tänker att även i dagar av motvind och uppförsbacke så sticker små artificiella ljusglimtar genom molntäcket, för mig att värma mitt kylslagna anlete på. Ari Golds vokabulär till exempel – ‘It’s like high school. You can’t fuck the prom queen until she finds out her best friend jerked you off underneath the bleachers!’

Emo

söndag, september 12th, 2010

I was walking across a bridge one day and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said,
”Stop! Don’t do it!”

”Why shouldn’t I?” he said.

”Well, there is so much to live for.”

”Like what?”

”Well, are you religious?”

He said yes.

I said, ”Me too! Are you Christian?”

”Christian.”

”Me too! Are you Lutheran, Catholic or Protestant?”

”Protestant.”

”Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?”

”Baptist.”

”Wow, me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?”

”Baptist Church of the Lord.”

”Me too! Are you Original Baptist Church of the Lord or are you Reformed Baptist Church of the Lord?”

”Reformed Baptist Church of the Lord.”

”Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of the Lord, reformation of 1879, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of the Lord, reformation of 1915?”

He said, ”Reformed Baptist Church of the Lord, reformation of 1879.”

I said, ”Die, heretic scum” and pushed him off.

- Emo Philips